Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord. - Hebrews 12:14
It is true that God’s way for us precludes any notion of intentionally being contentious with others, and this includes the sworn enemies of the faithful. It is also true that we must not seek conflict or belligerent combat with such people. In fact, the Book of Titus is distinct in its message to us - “Remind them to be submissive to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good work, to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people.” - Titus 3:1-2. To be clear: we are to pay heed as Paul speaks tersely and convincingly: “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” - Romans 12:18. But what are we to do when it is no longer possible to live in peace with our antagonists?
For the answer to this we must return to Hebrews 12 again: “See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no “root of bitterness” springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled; that no one is sexually immoral or unholy like Esau, who sold his birthright for a single meal.” - Hebrews 12:15-16. Based upon this passage we are instructed to “see to it,” to make sure . . . as far as it is possible for us, to avoid engaging in hostilities simply for the sake of hostility. For a season we may be charged with correcting the actions or words of another. But we are to do so in a Christian manner. “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4:29.
Nowhere in the Bible and in context are we ever instructed or commanded to break into open warfare for the simple sake of war. We are told in our titular passage that without holiness . . . “no one will see the Lord.” And holiness is not defined by a pugnacious attitude. “As obedient children, do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance, but as he who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, since it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.”- 1 Peter 1:14-16.
Our previous lives (before God) were based upon hard worldly positions. Any affront was to be dealt with swiftly and without prejudice. Meaning that along with our primary target, collateral damage would not only be possible but almost guaranteed. Certainly, any sound- minded individual can see the error in this worldly way of thinking. We often confuse a victory of the Word of God with our own personal victory. The two are not the same. “For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.”- Romans 8:6.
So how then are we to conduct ourselves in holiness when confronted by the world, the flesh, and the devil? To begin with, we must seek to control our mouths when engaging with the opposition. Yes, the world hates the very notion of filtering our words or ‘reeling it in.’ But that is the way of the world. God’s way is different as we see from the Book of James. “but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water.” - James 3:8-12. No matter how our opponents speak to us we cannot respond in kind. We must speak to them in a way that will allow them to soften their approach to us even if they choose not to. “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.” - Colossians 4:6. It has been said that the shrill histrionics displayed in the opponent’s tantrum is evidence that they recognize the error in their way of thinking; that is why they react so belligerently. Let us be sure that we aren’t reacting that way. We must remember that we are constantly to be speaking in a way that draws them to us rather than pitting them against us. “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” - Ephesians 4:31-32.
Our words must be heard as a godly way to edify others, not get them to toe the line in the sand.
